17 May 2017

Prosa Perpisahan

Please don't go away
Don't leave me
Don't go
Why does it have to be like this?
Just don't

Seribu kata berkecamuk di benak Rinda dan tertaut dalam lidah yang kelu. Tak terucapkan, tak tersampaikan. Tenggelam di balik tertutupnya pintu mobil saat dia bilang "..Sudah."
Sudah? Sudah cukup? Sudah selesai? Atau sudah betul-betul tak perlu bertemu lagi? 
Tak sedikitpun Rinda menyangka akan sesulit itu melepaskan dia karena awalnya dia datang tanpa undangan, dan sekarang Rinda melepasnya pergi dengan sejuta emosi. Dia yang awalnya sama sekali tak menarik hati Rinda dan tanpa terasa, tanpa Rinda sadari, telah mengobati hati Rinda secara pelan-pelan, rutin, namun konsisten, seperti pengobatan tradisional yang memakan waktu lama. Saat ia sembuh dan berlabuh di berbagai hati, baru terasa betapa lubang yang ditinggalkan saat ia hendak pergi membuat sakit Rinda kembali kambuh. 

Hari telah berlalu dan Rinda mabuk dalam kesunyian yang sepertinya sulit untuk terobati. Terngiang terus di kepalanya; kemarin, saat dia menoleh dan tak mau menatap mata Rinda. Menyudahi semuanya. 

Bukannya Rinda sudah bertekad untuk tidak merasakan perpisahan lagi? Tidak ingin sakit hati lagi seperti remaja-remaja mabuk cinta? Rinda heran, mengapa ini harus terasa sakit. Seperti racun yang menggerogoti perlahan-lahan. Padahal Rinda harusnya siap. Namun kenapa setiap lagu yang terputar secara acak serasa menampar muka Rinda dengan telak. Kenapa setiap melodi mengingatkan hal yang ingin dilupakan. 'Apa maumu hah?' Rinda merasa tiap lagu menghardiknya.

Life was so simple back then, and she wish that she could turn back the time and find everything was different. Mengapa seseorang harus menua dan memilih? Mengapa tidak bisa menyenangkan semua orang? Begitu banyak pertanyaan.

Ia terus membatin, apakah semuanya akan indah pada waktunya, apakah akan ada hadiah yang menantinya di kemudian hari. Hadiah yang setimpal. Tuhan yang tahu..

Namun saat ini Rinda hanya ingin sekali lagi berbalik di pintu pagarnya... dan berteriak sambil menahan dia supaya jangan pergi. Kalau perlu dalam tangis. Kalau perlu dia akan memborgol Paundra di pintu mobilnya agar tidak kemana-mana. Agar dia tahu, di balik segala kebisuan selama ini; Rinda membutuhkan dia, dan lubang yang ditinggalkan Paundra malam itu, terlalu besar untuk ditutupi.. terlalu pahit untuk dimengerti. Tapi dengan mulut yang terkunci Rinda berusaha menelan keputusannya; walaupun besar dan pahit, dan menenggak malam berbintang seperti cairan yang memabukkan.

04 May 2017

Java Jazz 2017 & Bandung-Jogja Trip

Can I just say how much I love traveling with cool people? What I mean by “cool” defines the same chemistry I have with those people when it comes to travel together. Lol. Believe me, you can be very wrong on choosing your travel mate. Whether it is the different traveling budget of each person, the route that each of you want to take, or simply just the different “traveling style” (for example, you are more an adventure type who likes to see the nature as much as possible, and your fella is more a shopping-monster; whose itinerary is full of the best shopping locations). Well of course it’s not always really bad, actually if you can manage to balance those differences you might find a wonderful and new experiences while tasting each other’s itinerary! In my case, I feel so thankful that I had the chance to travel with new people and find the “click” is just there all the time. No arguing, no different itinerary, pure laughter and fun. So here’s my travel journal exploring Bandung and Yogyakarta with three cool chicks.

So initially me and my vocal group friends (Oppy, Herin, and Ery) was planning to watch Java Jazz Festival 2017 in Jakarta. We bought the tickets and make a group chat to talk about it. Aaand suddenly the plan was expanding to be a Bandung-Yogyakarta trip for a week! Yeay.

the squad (left to right: OppyEry, me, and Herin

01 February 2017

Temporary Feelings and Solitude

You know what most frightened thing about life? If you ask me, my answer will be that the fact that in life everything is temporary, but funny thing is, it’s also make everything less scary, because again… everything is just temporary. Every beautiful thing, every happy moment, those are temporary. So does the sad things. 

Growing up, I learn many things about temporary feelings. I don't know about what others think, but I consider myself as a very loyal friend. When I love someone so much, I mean when I think of someone as my best friend that very close to my heart, I'll try my best to keep them around- sometimes there were times I am being too "possesive". As a strongheaded person, I had an ideal perspective on how everyone should treat their friends. When I don't like what I see, I dare to question it; why they've done such things. If I really care about someone, I will love him/her and that's my only motivation why I did and questioned this and that about them. That's why I feel sad about some of people that decided that they will no longer being so "close". I took my lesson and think about it for such a time. Years and years of learning, I did succeeded on discover why some things are just not meant to be. Because feelings are temporary. People grow, we are getting older, season changes, and how could we expect everyone would be the same person as they were in maybe, 10, 5, or 1 year ago? It is a normal thing to change; to have such temporary feelings. I thank God for everything that happened to me. No need to draw them back. It is all lead me to where I am now, and the progression I've been made is a learning from the my mistakes and other people's mistakes in the past. 

04 January 2017

Japan 2016 : How To Arrange My Japan Trip

Osaka Castle

I spent my childhood living with Japanese manga, and until the age of 15 I still read high doses of Japanese comics every day. It has always been a persistent dream to visit Japan someday.

I have been waited for this trip for so long, that I think I was too excited and didn’t plan it out carefully last year. So me and my friends bought the tickets in 2015, but it had to be cancelled due to some exams that I had to take last year. Learning from this experience, then I decided to wait for a time that was right. This is a country I wanted to see whole my life, so I wouldn’t let it slipped out of my fingers again. I hope you enjoy this blog post and it will help you through making your own Japan trip as well!

01 January 2017

Jakarta Dari Balik Helm

foto diambil waktu lagi nge-Gojek (jangan ditiru)

This post brings a nostalgic feeling to me. It's the feeling that puts a smile in your face. The feeling when you know you had a good memory that will lasts forever.

Bulan Februari tahun ini, setelah mengikuti ujian, ada gap waktu sebulan untuk menunggu hasilnya. I took a short holiday in Lombok after that, just 3 days; and I decided to go to Jakarta after that. Di Jakarta banyak keluarga, dan saya berpikir untuk mencoba-coba mencari kesempatan untuk magang di rumah sakit sambil mengisi kekosongan.

Siapa yang menyangka kalo pada akhirnya saya akan tinggal di Jakarta selama hampir 6 bulan?

Saya di Jakarta dari akhir Februari-Mei, pulang ke Makassar sepanjang Juni dan Juli, lalu kembali ke Jakarta di bulan Agustus dan tinggal hingga akhir September.

Waktu-waktu itu tidak terasa, seperi kata orang, saat waktu berlalu cepat berarti kau sangat menikmatinya.

30 July 2016

My Faith Journey: How I Became A Doctor

Since I was a little kid, I always dream to be a designer. Growing up, my "dream-job" list is  getting longer. I wanted to be an architect, a writer, badminton athlete, astronaut, actress, stylist, working in a magazine... Never in my wildest dream I intended to be a doctor.

Life can be so playful sometimes. Until now, I still don't exactly know why I entered med school. One thing I remember; I didn't trust myself that I could finish my engineering school on time due to my laziness and how bad I am on maths (building and structure requires a lot of maths). I decided to retry the  university exam again on the next year. All I knew was, I really wanted to move from Makassar and study abroad; maybe Bandung or Jakarta. But my parents was against my decision and they convince me to try local med school instead. I agreed and.. I got accepted, I didn't even know how it could happened. I was really scared after that. It was flattering; but scary. I didn't know if I could make it. I didn't even like blood for God sake. I didn't get the vibe that maybe most of Indonesian students feels; the euphoria of being med student. I felt like I wanna let go of the chance and go back to my architecture major. I really was not ready to be a new student again and to learn completely new things. 

In the end of day, after a lot of arguments with parents and with myself, especially.. I finally agreed to enter med school. And that's the beginning of everything.

05 July 2016

Cormoran Strike Series ( The Cuckoo's Calling, The Silkworm, Career of Evil) Review

Robert Galbraith is a pseudonym for J.K. Rowling, the author of the Harry Potter series and The Casual Vacancy.

The whole series takes the perspective of an ex-soldier Cormoran Strike, private detective who lost part of a leg in a bombing in Afghanistan. He run a nearly-broke detective agent in London and with the help of his pretty assistant Robin Ellacott, he faces some mysterious cases and juggle with complicated personal life as well. 

Honestly, I started read the books around 3 years ago based by the fact it is written by J.K Rowling alone, under the alias of Robert Galbraith. The lady, seems to be the only author that can make me truly interested in crime stories, because normally they bore me as well as frustrate me (I can’t never seem to guess who the murderer is). And I safely may say; I am never disappointed at all. Reading these three books thou, is somewhat a journey for me. I learn to be loyal. Loyal here means, you know I love Rowling so much, that whatever books she write I will definitely put my eyes into it; no matter what genre it is all about. The first book, The Cuckoo’s Calling wasn’t really impress me. For me it was slow pacing, drifting to irrelevant sub-plots, over detailed filling scenes and repetitive situations, but I was adamant that I should keep at it since it’s Rowling; again, and I am super glad that I did so. The climax was great and making worthy all the effort to read the novel. I like how it was about modelling industry, and after finished the 1st book I decided to give it a next try (on the 2nd book).